unreasonable boss update

[sewhappy]

First of all I want to thank everyone for the support, understanding and wonderfull advise!! I had decided to just keep quite as I enjoy the job so much and we all know "What goes around comes around." Now she is backstabbing her partner!! She does it to other employees as well as myself. I heard her last week going on about how this woman (her sis-in-law) does not trust her (Iwonder why) How she doesn't know a thing about quilting "in fact she would'nt know which end of the needle to thread if it were'nt for me"-any many other comments. Once I realized i could hear her and so could customers I made it a point to knock over two bolts of fabric -she and the employee she was talking to looked up right at me and continued!! I can not believe this woman! Now, I can handle the nasty talk about me (I don't like it nor do I feel I deserve it) but to do this to her own family is truly sad and unproffessional to say the least!! I have decided to talk to her partner should this happen again! Then just take what comes at that point as I feel she is only going to destroy the morale and eventually the shop!!

I hope that is the right thing to do!

[chickenscratch]

I think I would go to the partner and explain that you have overheard some comments while working out in the shop (you don't have to divulge what you heard if you don't feel comfortable) and you are concerned that customers can also hear these comments and it might hurt business. Surely they will look at it from that point of view as being hurtful.

[GERRY]

Hi Sew-un-happy:

Take the time to write down what you are over hearing, plus the time, the date, & the preson she was talking to. That way if the backstabber is ever confronted, you will be more believeable, if you have it on paper, if not it will be her word againest your's.

When this happened to me, & I quit, T.P.I.T.BUTT, moved on to another victum. On a high note , she was fired about a year after I quit (the gals called me to let me know).

You are so right , her nasty ways will hurt business, even if they listen to her while they are in the shop, it will make many girls unconfortable, & they will hesitate to come back. She is not only hurting her own family, she is hurting herself as well:( how sad.

[Bekah]

Sewhappy, You are in a difficult situation but I agree you need to let her partner know because it will make people uncomfortable and it could be very damaging to the business. It is especially bad because she is talking to other employees and is loud enough to be heard. Because of my background, I would first of all pray for wisdom and the right words to say and then go to the other partner in gentleness of spirit.

Please keep us posted on how things go.

[quilterscafe]

I've had alot of experience with this kind of situation, unfortunately. To a reasonable person, her behavior is plain old just not acceptable to most people. But if you get inside her head, and really understand her world view, she will see you as a threat if you try to confront her behavior, even if in the most polite way possible, even if its only out of concern for her business rather than yourself. Sometimes, you just have to let the wookie win, but I know its a bitter pill to swallow. I found a good book that made me laugh while also helping me to see how sometimes this is truly the only option that will help you stay on good terms with this kind of person. Its called, How to Work for an Idiot, by John Hoover.

I completely sympathize with your plight. Hang in there!

Kathy

[JuliaDay]

Gossip is Gossip. Having had a relationship go very far south with my mother and sister due to evil gossip, I would recommend that you do not get involved. I am sure they already know what your are going to say. Inevitably, it will come back to you that you were "eavesdropping" or what ever other evil speak someone says about you. I can't fix someone elses behaviour as much as you would like to try.

God bless and don't let the "mean and thoughtless" people get you down.

jmd