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just for fun - You Might Be a Long Arm Quilter When (please add on)


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In the way of Jeff Foxworthy, I thought it would be fun to pass this around. Please add to it, it can only get funnier :)

You Might Be a Long Arm Quilter When----

you have straight pins with needle holes punctured in the plastic flower head

the fantasy that keeps you awake at night is a quilt design

your best friend shows you her latest quilt project and you can't see past the loose threads that she missed

you return a call thinking it's your friend Jane X only to find out it's your customer Jane Y demanding to know when her quilt will be done.

What else??

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You might be a long arm quilter when....

Cc's and tt's aren't in reference to the alphabet,

Bumps on the bottom refers to batting and not a body part (so does pimples on bottom, dimples on top),

Custom verses overall doesn't refer to a paint job

(My mind is still on the unfinished customer quilt begging for me to come quilt some more. Can't wait to see what others come up with. Great topic, Annie!)

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You might be a long arm quilter when.............

You run to the store and still have threads stuck all over your shirt

See possible quilting designs everywhere.........wallpaper, carpet, etc.

Always thinking ahead at what to try next and can't wait for the right quilt to come along to try them

Always looking for new ideas, tips, DVDs

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You might be a longarm quilter when...

You walk into the LQS and go straight for the thread.

Your freezer is full so you don't have to make dinner every night.

Your gifts under the tree are from Superior Threads, Columbia River Quilting, and APQS. ( I got a letter from APQS and opened it since it was addressed to me. It was a receipt for Dennis for new leaders. Surprise!! :D )

Those "other" people in your life don't have a clue what you do and congratulate you for having a nice "hobby". hahaha!

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You might be a long arm quilter when

You get excited to shop at home depot ...

You find that using plastic storage meant for wrapping paper is better used to store those over sized pantos...and shove the wrapping paper under the bed unprotected ...

When you have more money invested in pantos than new clothes...

When your big a$$ "sewing machine" has a better parking spot than your husbands prized truck...

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You might be a long arm quilter when

the hardware store has become your best friend and you know the sales associates by name...

You design a room around the best storage - not the beauty

You tell your friends you don't have time for lunch - they ask why & you say you have to finish a quilt & they have no idea what you are talking about or they want lunch and you suggest that dinner would be better - don't interrupt me during the day........... I have things to do .............

DH wants attention and you sit there fidgeting thinking about the quilt on the frame that needs to be finished so the next one can get loaded and finished

The pup comes up wanting attention and you tell him in your best, most kind voice that you only have a few more stitches before you can take him out for his walk.

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You might be a longarmer when . . . .

  • most of your tee shirts have little holes across your belly
  • you still buy washable crayola and there are no kids in the house
  • you've never been inside one of those fancy "bedding" stores
  • a wide back is a very good thing

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You might be a longarm quilter when:

You spend more time with (Edna...you put your name here) than with anyone else...and love it!

You clean that room more than any other in the house.

You carry your tools on you...gotta keep 'em handy.

Many conversations start with...I know you are busy, but...

You wake up at 4 am sneaking up to your quilting room so you can get "a good start on the day"

Friends and relatives know the name of your machine better than your living friends and relatives names.

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I love these....

also, you might be a long arm quilter when ...

you are always looking for the next new long arm ruler

you are always looking for the next new marking device

you are always looking for a cool new design to try on the next quilt and try to balance that with what your customer is willing to pay...

your fingers always have pin stabs in them but you don't mind

you bypass fabric and patterns and go directly to thread as you know you won't have time to make a quilt for yourself

Everytime you go to the local Lowe's or Home depot with your DH, you are always on the lookout for something that you can use when longarming....

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You might be a longarmer when . . .

Your dogs have colored threads interspersed with their fur

You carry your iPad around the house, in case there is a new post on the Forum

You stop piecing tops and never get around to getting them quilted

You find it difficult to find things to talk about with people who don't quilt

You spend days in the house without ever leaving because you are on a quilting 'roll'

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You know your a long armer when:

Your DH knows what SID, CC's, pantos, and beadboard is not relating to wood is

You go directly to the quilts in LQS to see the designs and get motivated

Your friends ask you to go on a day long shopping trip for Christmas and you tell them no I don't have time need to quilt, gift certificates will be fine for them this year.

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You might be a longarmer when"

Your dark colored shirt and pants are covered in batting fuzz.

You are a volunteer EMT and when you jump in the ambulance the patient asks why you have an apron on and a scissors on a lanyard around your neck.

When you want to plan a family vacation around a quilt show so you can take some more longarm classes.

When you are trying to explain to your husband why you can't (or won't) fix the washing machine, change a flat tire etc but you think nothing of taking your longarm machine apart and retiming it, adjusting tension, or finding the number "8" screw etc.

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you might be a LA quilter when...

...you sit at night to watch a movie with DH with a magna doodle in your lap.

...on vacation, you are seen photographing draperies, walls and floors.

...your son describes you to his teacher as 'the one threads on her clothes.'

fun thread, annie!

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You might be Longarmer when your husband asks "When are you going to take the dog for a walk?"

Reply "After I quilt for a while."

Husband states "Oh, so several hours then."

You might be one of us if the term "Friendly borders does not mean that you stand at your fence and wave at your neighbors.

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