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"No More" Quilt Project


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Ladies and Gents,

 

One of my friends lost her son two years ago to Domestic Violence.  His wife murdered him and was just recently convicted of the crime.  My friend has made the commitment to bring awareness to the "genderless" domestic violence issue to honor her son Joshua Hilberling.  I want to help by designing a quilt and producing it (with her help - she's my quilting student) so it can be auctioned off by our local intervention agency to help raise awareness to Male victims of this social crime.  If I put together a pattern sheet....how many of you quilters out there would be interested in making one in your own communities and donating it to your local intervention agency for the same purpose?  It would be made of masculine fabrics....something very simple to make too!  Here is my first thought on the design....I really need to get a quilt design software package!

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HI,

 

I am so sorry this happened to your friend and her son.....Things like this are just so hard to understand...and I really don't think you ever can....

As to the quilt design.....I would like to know more about what your friend wants this quilt to say.  Does she want it to tell of the violence, the loss, the sadness?  Does she want it to be a tribute to her son of the things he loved?  Are you thinking of this as an Art quilt? or as a quilt someone can cuddle in?  Is the vision to use the quilt as mainly a fundraiser?  Or as a visual reminder of what happened?  I think it is a good thing to bring awareness to violence and I also know  men don't often talk about abuse. I don't know if I would make one although I would want too....I just have some many projects and UFO's to complete some of which I am planning on donating to other causes.......I think anyway we as quilters can help to bring less violence and more caring to this world is something we all can do...Lin

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The organization NoMore.org has a symbol which is the center of the design...to have 0 domestic violence.  The real problem is that male domestic violence is hardly ever talked about....I could find not a single shelter in Oklahoma geared towards male domestic violence....so with that being said:

 

We see the quilt as being a stepping stone to bring awareness to the issue - not just here but everywhere...we want it to be useful to the purchaser so not artsy but functional.  The raw edge circles signify a couple of things to me...first being a goal of No More domestic violence....secondly to show that it's often a circle of violence always coming back to the beginning and then starting over.  The borders between the individual circle blocks show that there are boundaries that need to met in all relationships including respect...and last but not least (I think the most important part) is the fact that all teh circle blocks have no outside boundary because domestic violence has no boundaries in our society - it affects everyone : rich, poor, male female, with children and without.

 

The male prints would help us associate it with bringing awarenes to the male victims of domestic violence and Josh's story.

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curious...what do the blue circles represent?

 

i have a son with type 1 diabetes, and i know that a blue circle is an awareness symbol for that particular disease. is it the same for domestic violence?  

That particular circle is from the logo from NoMore.org.....

they are the national organization to stop domestic violence and sexual assault

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I also like the design.  And, I like the two-color look of your drawing, too.  I think any accompanying documentation can explain the symbolism, or put it on the label.  You could also add more colors..maybe plain colors like in your drawing, but in red, brown, black, yellow...to signify all ethnicities.  This is going to me very nice, and I hope it does well for your organization.

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Michelle, I'm sorry for your friend. It must be hard to cope with something like that. I can't begin to imagine. My two girls went to school with a little girl in a grade under theirs. Her father killed their whole family in the middle of the night by nailing their doors shut, shooting them, setting the house on fire, and then killing himself. It was a horrific thing for the community to understand. It's not just men that do terrible things, unfortunately. Awareness is power. I would love to make a quilt when you are finished with your pattern. Do you have an idea of where I would donate it? 

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Hi, When you have the pattern ready, I would like to make one also. Awareness needs to be made big time. My all time favorite teacher in high school used to come to school with bruises all the time. He finally divorced his wife, and is so much happier. I still see him all the time. This was 34 years ago, times are not changing and probably even worse now. Thank you for doing this.

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  • 4 weeks later...

Well after a couple of weeks off doing some hand quilting, I am now getting ready to start making this quilt.  I will PDF all the instructions and templates for the quilt as I go.    When they are done I will email everyone the pattern instructions and the background information on the quilt.

My friend has approached our local DVIS and Family Safety Center and they will welcome the quilt as an auction item....I am so happy for this little joyous bit of news as she is continuing to go through the media circus surrounding this tragedy.  The young girl who killed her son is now awaiting sentencing. 

 

Jeanne and I have thought that maybe the funds could be used to set up "Josh's Ride" - a program that would provide free taxi rides to local Family Safety Centers for victims.

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